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And I sneezed a great sneeze.
The real story is about a sneeze and a cup of sugar.
That's when my nose started to itch.
I felt a sneeze coming on.
Absolutely nothing is happening. They're just thinking about it...
He's really thinking about it.
Tradescantia table
Ladybug detail
Tradescantia with opened drawer
Helianthus Divaricatus table
Helianthus Divaricatus top
Bad dog. Go home.
Keep on this path until you pass the gas station. Take a left. It's the third cottage on the right - you can't miss it.
Two tiered table
The path to Granny's cottage
Granny's cottage detail
Red makes a friend on her stroll through the woods
Magnolia table
Magnolia detail
Red Makes a Friend
Painted two-tiered wooden (mahogany) table

20 x 20 x 27"
Bottom shelf
Little Red Riding Hood, or
"Bad Dog. Go Home."
Painted drop-leaf wooden table

36 x 22.5 x 20" leaves down
36 x 42 x 20" leaves up
Top detail
Bottom shelf detail
Top shelf
"I huffed. And I snuffed. And I sneezed a great sneeze."
Painted drop-leaf wooden table
from The True Story of the 3 Little Pigs!, by A. Wolf
as told to Jon Scieszka, illustrated by Lane Smith

30 x 18 x 16.25" leaves folded
39 x 27 x 15.5" leaves unfolded
Table with leaves unfolded
Table with leaves folded
Unfolded table top
Leaf detail
Painted wooden table with drawer

22 x 11.5 x 29"
Table top
Inside drawer
Table with opened drawer
Painted wooden table

25 x 25 x 21"
Helianthus Divaricatus
Painted wooden table with leather top (with divine aroma of pipe tobacco permeating this old table)

12 x 12 x 23"
Royal Hosta
Copper painted wooden table

15 x 15 x 23"
Painted wooden table

11.25  x 11.25  x 27"
Leatherwood Christmas Tree Farm (Dellwood, North Carolina)
Painted wooden (mahogany) drop leaf table

Leaves down: 48 x 21 x 16.5"
Leaves up: 48 x 38 x 16.5"
Royal Hosta table
Royal Hosta table top
Poppy two tiered table
Poppy table top
Dellwood, North Carolina (West of Asheville)
Leatherwood Christmas Tree Farm
Canoodle* Table (with hidden relationship mojo charms)
Painted wooden table (entry for Exposed: Nudes In Art 2008, a biannual invitational exhibition
at Litmus Gallery, Raleigh, North Carolina:

Function: intransitive verb
To pet, fondle (as in "lovers canoodling in the dark")

30 x 30 x 28"
Table top
Table top
Leaves up
Leaves down
Table top
Top detail
Sold (commissioned piece)
Why painted tables?

Because they're fun. Jewelry for the house, like the one outrageous bracelet that makes an outfit.
Because everyone has the perfect spot for one small outrageous table. Because they lift  the spirit.
Just because.
Well I huffed. And I snuffed.
Wolf detail

If you sometimes find nudity distasteful, please skip the last table.

"Oh look! Isn't he just the sweetest little thing."
Vintage mahogany coffee table
Angels at The Nativity
Oils on vintage mahogany
occasional table

Detail from The Nativity
by Philippe de Champaigne, 1643

36 x 18 x 16.5"
Snit the Puppycat
F.O.U.S. (Feline of unusual size)
Snitty Kitty Table
Snit the puppycat, F.O.U.S. (Feline Of Unusual Size)
Painted wooden table

18 x 11 x 24"